I’m picking out a Thermos for you

My brother, Mittens, and I recently watched Steve Martin’s The Jerk, a classic staple of comedic cinematography that our parents would not stop quoting, so we sat down to see why. Now we get it.

The scene that surprised Mittens the most was the romantic walk on the beach that Martin and Bernadette Peters’ characters share, because the song (Tonight You Belong to Me) was actually quite lovely, and went almost uninterrupted by something funny. I had heard the song before while working (briefly) at a bar called Insomnia (before I was fired for sleeping in… sigh) on a CD of ukulele songs, and had fallen quite in love with the vocal harmonies. So now that we’ve had proper inspiration, Mittens and I will join our sister‘s quest to learn to play the ukulele and form the world’s tinniest sounding band. What we really want is to add the almost-ten-year-old sister in on the upright bass to round out the sound.

Please welcome to the stage: Biggie and the Smalls!

Our first song would be Baba O’Riley, because we all agree that is the best song, and also it’s ironic because only one of us is currently a teenager. Also the beginning would sound hella awesome on ukuleles and the bass could possibly be played with a hammer.

EMI GET ON THIS THIS IS SOME GOOD STUFF

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Comics are back!

After weeks and weeks of me forgetting to post comics keeping you at the edge of your seat, Comic Tuesdays have returned! Here’s the comic that heralds their triumphant new beginning:

This is why I buy lots of hair elastics. And snake venom antidote.

Yes, this happened one day. Literally. There were snakes. I should probably have told someone about this, but honestly, I was just happy to escape while not being turned to stone. The Toronto transit system is just rife with character(s).

How I feel…

…when I think about my poor stolen bike. It’s been almost 2 months, but I’ll never forget you, Rusty…

I feel ya, bro.

RAWR

THIS IS A THING

ENJOY IT

 

BETSEY JOHNSON SAYS IT'S TASTY TUESDAY

 

Wednesday comic!

Like a Tuesday comic, only Wednesdayer.

My sister was only 6 at the time.

So I told you I would post part 1 later. This is part one! This is why little girls should avoid asking big sisters (with little to no censor buttons) why boys are boys and girls are girls. Little girls should ask mommies who have experience with this question. Actually, come to think of it, my mom was similarly blunt with me. Maybe not so anatomically specific, but certainly blunt… that probably explains a lot.

FINALLY

I got my computer back. I left it at my parents’ house when I left after Christmas and that was two whole days ago. Which means I a) just finished hyperventilating, b) desperately need to answer about an hour’s worth of emails, c) obviously am procrastinating on that and d) am late for Tuesday Comic once again.

My sister thinks I’m gross. She’s right.

This was drawn back in the days of Biology at U of T, which were soon thwarted by OrgChem as a prereq to every other upper year class ever. I had intended to become a medical illustrator and discovered that many illustrators with Bio backgrounds were chosen over those with Fine Arts degrees. Then I failed Chemistry and went back to English, the end. (Also, yes, it does say “pt. 2” and I will issue pt. 1 soon. BECAUSE I CAN.)

Noooo…

I totally forgot about the very existence of Comic Tuesday and now it is Not Comic Friday. Dang.

Here is a belated comic in tribute to my family and the loving bonds between siblings:

Scully’s driving?? DRINK

This comic is made even better by the fact that I will NEVER HAVE UNDERGRAD ENGLISH HOMEWORK AGAIN. Yeah, it’s pretty awesome.

For my archery friends

Today’s Comic Tuesday is dedicated to the weirdos that like to stick their shafts in enormous butts from 18 metres away.

That’s right, my archery club.

Also I can't draw noses.

 
This is dedicated to everyone in the club who’s achieved the impressive feat of shooting one arrow into the end of another – whether you meant to or not – and has had to go all the way out to Waterloo to get two new ones. Because that’s basically what you end up with, after the adrenaline’s worn off.

COMIC TUESDAY

Just missed it by THAT much. Was busy all day today preparing a Mexican feast for my Cook the Books class. It was our last class, so nobody cared that we missed Dio de los Muertos by a full month and four days. More on that tomorrow. For now:

dress appropriately!

Yeah, this is what’s going down in Toronto, weatherwise. Last week I weeded my patio, brushing snow off the mustard flower as I went, and today the weather couldn’t really decide if it would rain or not. Yesterday hit double digits, temperature-wise. This is why I keep at least one umbrella on my person at all times.

P.S. This is my 50th post! L!

Wednesday is the new Tuesday

So because yesterday was supposed to be comic day, but I was busy writing a 12-page paper for Irish class, I had to postpone the posting till today and declare today officially Tuesday instead. So set your calendars accordingly.

I don’t understand this. If your phone rings while you’re in the bathroom, occupado shall we say, WHY on earth would you answer it?? (As a sidenote – my mum calls this “multitasking.” Hang up if she tells you she’s multitasking.)

Whenever I hear a phone ring in a public bathroom, and the person actually picks up, I always flush immediately. Because you are being weird and making me uncomfortable, and toilet-flushing is a risk you knew you were taking when you picked up that phone. DEAL WITH IT.